Wednesday, September 23, 2015

My Haunted Wedding Ring

So, I have this ring.  My grandmother gave it to me, it was her sister's wedding band.  It's a tiny thing and the metal was worn so thin that I had the diamonds reset years ago.  When my husband asked me to marry him, we created an engagement ring to accompany my aunt's ring with the intent of using it as part of the wedding set.  I ended up using a simple gold band, but I still pull out my aunt's ring whenever I want to feel fancy.  Funny thing though...

It's haunted.

OK, maybe haunted is too strong a word.  But seriously, something is going on with this ring.
Whenever I sleep with it on, without fail, I have the CRAZIEST dreams.  This has been going on for years.  Strange and bizarre dreams that make you ask yourself "dude, where the hell did that come from?!"  Last night's dream was no exception.

I've looked into it somewhat.  The ring is simple--three diamond baguettes set in a thin band.   Since the setting is new (ish), I can't imagine any vibes other than my own imbedding the ring.  Diamonds are a fairly innocuous stone as far as magick goes.  Mostly I use them to bolster other stones I may be using for spellwork.  Traditionally diamonds are used for protection.  So what's going on with mine?!

Sadly, since my grandmother and all of her siblings have passed on, I really have no way of finding out what kind of person my great aunt was, other than my own personal recollections which include a LOT of fresh garden vegetables.  She was a widow and had no children of her own.  I loved her, but it was a child's love.

I've done cleansings on the ring, but still...

Any thoughts?

Friday, May 15, 2015

Magickal Fennel

So, I've got this fennel plant in my garden.  It's totally a weed, but it's so pretty early in the spring that I let it grow, promising myself I'll move/kill it soon.  Then the swallowtail butterflies find it and start laying their eggs on it and then I don't want to mess with it 'cuz, you know, BUTTERFLIES! And then dammit, another year goes by with this GIANT plant in my garden.  

In all honesty, it's pretty all the way to fall, but since it's a volunteer of course it's in an inconvenient spot.  By Midsummer it is totally blocking any light my butterfly garden might get.  Aaand, since it volunteered between rocks, I can't effectively harvest the bulb and eat it.

Fortunately it is a wonderful herb for a witch's garden.  Obviously, since I can't kill it, it's super easy to grow, and up until the swallowtail caterpillars move in, I use the shiznit outa it, both in the kitchen and magickally.  My favorite use is for protection, since I'm totally done with fennel's fertility aspect.  Back in the baby days, I drank fennel seed tea by the gallon to keep up the milk production, and I still like to hang a bouquet of fennel fronds over the doors on Midsummer Eve for protection.   In all honesty though, there's nothing I can say about fennel that isn't said by the wonderful folks at Herbal Riot, so to learn more hit this link: 

Seriously though, this winter?  I'm totally moving that plant.

Monday, January 5, 2015

Pagan Pajamas!

It's freaking cold here.  Seriously, even the cat won't go outside.  The downside--I'm trapped in a post-Yuletide house with bored kiddoes who absolutely do NOT wish to help with the de-Yulification process.  The upside?  Pajama weather.

I won't lie--I'm a firm believer in getting your ass outa bed each morning and putting on your big-girl pants.  The whole "I can't decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest" quote is just not me.  That said, I'm totally not getting outa my jammies today.  They've got wiener dogs all over them, and while I neither own nor even know any wiener dogs personally, I just love saying wiener dog.  Wiener dog wiener dog wiener dog.

The only thing that would make these wiener dog pajama bottoms better is if the wiener dogs were wearing witches' hats.  And that, my angels, is the point of this post.

I think there's a market for pagan pajama bottoms.  You know, something other than the orange and black Halloween pajamas you may or may not find on clearance around now, or the Harry Potter pj's left over from that Daniel Radcliffe phase I went through (it was dark times...).  I know I'd wear them (especially if they had magick wiener dogs on them), and I couldn't possibly be the only one.

So here you go, all you enterprising folks with a serger and an Etsy account.  Pagan-themed pajama bottoms.  You're welcome.

Oh, and I like mine to ride low on the hips, and hang a little longer around the ankles.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Poppies For Young Men...

"In Flanders' fields the poppies blow..."

One autumn I optimistically amended my flower beds with blood meal...LOTS of blood meal...hoping the nitrogen content would boost my spring plantings.
Boy did it!
Not only did my usual plants thrive, but poppies--dozens of poppies--sprang up EVERYWHERE.
I hadn't planted poppies in years, yet suddenly it seemed that every dormant seed in my soil had decided to wake up.  The blood meal was key.

Then I had a sobering thought...
"In Flanders' fields the poppies blow..."

Like many kids, I had to memorize John McCrae's poem "In Flanders Fields."  I liked the poem, it was an easy 'A,' but I never made the connection between poppies and death in war until my garden exploded with poppies as a result of my blood meal feeding.

Now, when I treat my flower beds with blood meal, I do so in honor of the brave men and women who have served my country.  And each spring I am reminded to be grateful.

Thank you.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Rocking the Early Post Halloween Sales

OK, reason # 653 of 'Why I Love Halloween?'  Two words:
The Sales.

I wasn't even looking for Halloween stuff at this point--it's a week before Halloween for Goddess' sake!  I usually hit the sales day before or day of.  But while on a quest (unfulfilled) for the perfect pair of canvas sneakers (cuz, you know, I NEEDS me some more canvas sneakers), I stumbled into Williams Sonoma where all Halloween merchandise was on clearance.  Never one to say no to a deal I snagged me some excellent Halloween booty.  Score!

$3.99--What?!!  I'll totally use these all year...

$4.99 for this bad boy--I may have to gut a pumpkin early just to play.  
Any accessory for the power drill is OK by me...

$.99?!!!  I should have stocked up for Yule presents! 

Better still...crazy pumpkins were on sale for $1.99 each at my local Target.  I filled my cart and took a picture of the display just in case they wanted to fight me on it.  No mistake though.  I should have gotten more...

Friday, October 24, 2014

Crap I Can Get My Kids To Eat If I Call It Halloween Food

I'm not gonna lie to you--my kids are not particularly picky eaters.  So long as the food is brown and probably fried, they'll eat it no problem.  They're good like that.  This is yet another reason why I LOVE Halloween, and you know, around here, Halloween lasts from mid September until the candy runs out (like, late September).

Anyhoo, back when the kids were more gullible younger, I started making special "Halloween" themed foods.  I was amazed by what I could get away with serving them.  There's no WAY they would have eaten anything even remotely healthy without threat of no TV, yet here they were asking for more!

Here are a few of the dishes that have made the cut so far:

Witch fingers--These are green beans lightly sautéed in a little olive oil and then sprinkled with kosher
salt.  I know it's so rude and I hate the green old-lady stereotype, being neither green nor old-ladyish myself.  But if it gets a vegetable or two down my sweet offsprings' gullets, I will deal.  For a bonus, if you toss some sesame seeds on it you can call them maggots.

Witch hair--(Seriously?  I really need to come up with better Halloween archetypes to name my food for)--VERY finely shredded purple cabbage (you'll totally have to get a cheap V-slicer for this one, just be sure not to slice off the tips of your fingers), again lightly sauteed in a little oil and salted to taste.  If you add a tinytinytiny bit of apple cider vinegar to it the color will be brighter.

Peas are obviously monster boogers.  So is edamame.  Honestly, the grosser the name, the more likely my creepy babies are to eat it.

Black lentils, or any lentils for that matter--eye of newt.  HA!  No witch in that food!  I usually serve this in the form of Wicked Chili.

These are just a few of our favorites.  When I'm being realistic I'll work a couple of these dishes into the kids' normal chicken-tender laden meal (except the chicken tenders are mummy scabs, of course).  So, in case you were wondering, here's tonight's menu:

Mummy Scabs
Scary pasta (Halloween themed pasta I picked up at the grocery--it's got bat and spider shapes.  I should really stock up on this stuff now)
with creamy pus (white cheese sauce of course--straight out of the Velveeta packet)
and monster boogers.
I'll probably add a side of witch hair just to make the plate colorful.
I'm totally grossing myself out just writing about this right now.

Thursday, October 23, 2014


(Warning--this one's about a 9 on the "ew" scale.  Seriously.)

So I opened the front door this morning to find a couple of piles of what I thought was nasty cat vomit on my welcome mat.  Turns out they were a couple of piles of inside-out rodent.  I'm not sure which is worse, but the welcome mat is never gonna be the same.  Seems the sweet, cuddly little 'integrated-pest-management-system' which is my cat left me a present.  Bless him.

Aaanyway, as usual, I was the one who got stuck de-ewing the front porch and as I'm trying to pick up random rat organs with my grocery bag-wrapped hand I was reminded of the ancient (and kinda gross) practice of haruspicy (also called extispicy), and I couldn't help but wonder what an ancient Etruscan haruspex would have gotten out of my sweet kitty's morning offering.  Ooh, and on a new moon too!  Hmmm....

Personally I suspect it was a death threat.